the other morning i heard something that encouraged me and was all in good timing. from EM: "if you keep trying to control your world, you'll never be apart of a different world..."it's good to have a creative mindset.
"For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them." -E2:8
sometimes, like when i remember being a child, i secretly wish i could get paid to just read. that way everything would just be taken care of... and i would live a small life. small home, probably just a bathtub to sleep in like Ms. Hepburn. with only a coke in the fridge and salt crackers in the pantry. in this dream i wouldn't be allergic to cats... so i'd have a cat. then there would be piles of books just everywhere. instead of having piles of other miscellaneous things scattered around my room, it would be books. encouraging ones... of magical faraway places, with princes and kings, and friendships that would be bonded together forever. i constantly dream of being a child again. those are the times that i am shocked by the reality of life. however i don't ever wish that my dreams would go away... and that simplicity would occur on a daily basis. and the God who controls my life would wipe away the reality, and find some good. some good love.
speaking of reality, i have been wrung out so good this weekend. how do i get so tired so easily? and if i'm asking questions... what am i really doing with my life? hoping for some answers to that soon.